Why a blog now...

So here it is...I have OFFICIALLY broken up with my "boyfriend" of 4+ years. Moved out the whole nine yards. The relationship had it's good moments...but the BAD moments are most memorable. The relationship should have been done long ago. Maybe after the first time he cheated, or I moved out, or he broke something, or I contemplated having him run over by a bus.

But I guess like all relationships, there is a period of mourning...and it's crazy because the relationship should be over. Don't trust him, can't stand most of his friends, we come from two different lifestyles, points of view, values, you know...all the things that make a relationship not work. The volatilty and hostility were second to...the soaps.

With all of that, I really don't have a place to deal with the emotions, no crying, no yelling, no dealing. I don't sleep as it is, so I think, and I ponder and I wonder, and replay all the scenarios and scenes of what was, what it is and what could be...I'm tired.

That's why I'm here (this blog will not just be about him---I'm not giving him that much room in my life) but he is the impetus that propelled me here. I write when I have issues---my way of venting---so I'm venting.

Jill Scott's song Insomnia is my theme...