29.11.09
WH Social Secretary, Ms. Desiree Rogers
Probably won't see her often, but this is the lady who makes all the WH's events a smashing success! She keeps LadyO's calendar bubbling with über events.
Mrs.O - Follow the Fashion of Mrs.O: What and Whom She's Wearing - Home - State Dinner Preview
For the State Dinner preview this afternoon, Mrs. O changed ensembles, rewearing her J.Crew Crystal constellation cardigan, first seen in London last April, paired with a Rachel Roy "Marble" pencil skirt. The ensemble is cinched at the waist by a wide silver belt, featuring a clear square buckle.
To note, Rachel Roy is an Indian-American designer - a thoughtful sartorial choice by Mrs. O, likely in reference to the cultural heritage of the guests of honor. Mrs. O has worn one of Rachel Roy's dresses before, choosing the Reid dress...Read More>>>Mrs.O - Follow the Fashion of Mrs.O: What and Whom She's Wearing - Home - State Dinner Preview
Mrs.O - Follow the Fashion of Mrs.O: What and Whom She's Wearing - Home
First Lady Mrs. O has debuted her ensemble for the state dinner, wearing a gown by Indian-American designer Naeem Khan. The strapless gown features hand cut sterling silver sequins sewn on champagne silk chiffon, which create an abstract floral pattern. The dress is entirely handmade, requiring three weeks of work by 40 people, completed in Naeem Khan's family workshop in India. The custom, one-of-a-kind gown was made by the designer with the theme of Mrs. O's first state dinner in mind. The evening honors the stateside visit of Indian Prime Minister, Manmohan Singh, and his wife, Gursharan Kaur.
Mrs. O accessorized her ensemble with oversize Bochic drop earrings, featuring a fleur de lis at each ear and tear drop shapes made of gold and purple stones. Mrs. O completed the look with a dramatic stack of gold and diamond bangle bracelets on her left arm, a coordinating champagne-colored wrap, and her hair swept into a loose, romantic updo. Read More>>>Mrs.O - Follow the Fashion of Mrs.O: What and Whom She's Wearing - Home
25.11.09
Thanksgiving Announcement
Thanksgiving Rule: We are no longer providing alibil's or cover stories for family members. If you are not supposed to be here - or not 'sposed to be here with who you with - you are on your own as we will not lie to your significant other for you; nor to your P.O. or employer. *The Management*
MICH O is KILLING IT!
Ok, last year, I was a little appalled by the black dress and the 75MM pearl necklaces and no slip...so this was such a pleasure. For real, LadyO is superlative...super sexy, sophisticated and oh so stylish in this. Her skin is gleaming and glittering...and her husband as always seem so enamored and proud to be by her side (to be fair she looks equally enthralled). I. L.O.V.E.I.T. She's gorgeous...
Her dress was designed by Indian-American designer Naeem Khan.
Her dress was designed by Indian-American designer Naeem Khan.
24.11.09
Today's Funny---Shopping for a Husband
A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch...you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor; but you cannot go back down except to exit the building. So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor, the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord. Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids. The third floor sign reads, Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids and are extremely good looking. "Wow!" she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads, Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework, "Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!" Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads, Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak. She is so tempted to stay; but, she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please, Thank You for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!
Consequence or Deed...which one has you shook?
FOOD4THOUGHT: Often times when we say that we are sorry……. it is because of the consequence and not because of the deed.
23.11.09
I Was Not Built To Break...
What is a broken woman? For there are many. Where did they come from? When did we lose our strength and dignity as beings who were once held sacred and in high esteem, as the ones who brought forth new life and gifted our peoples with many things? As women, we are the hearth of the family, the nurturing force in the lives of our sons, brothers, and even our fathers in their old age.Our old ones always brought the bread for the woman to bake. Even if she was sick and in bed, Grandfather would take the dough to her so she could knead it before it went in the oven. Not because he was being insensitive and disrespectful, but because woman brought life to the food, and our ancestors knew this and respected it. As women we have the power to teach our sons how a sister, mother, lover should be treated. We can empower them with respect for all life, so they will know the value of peace. As the primary caretakers of children when they are young, women can be a powerful force in the development of their sons.
It is time for us as women to take responsibility for the results of our children’s upbringing. For it is not only men who are to blame for wars, abuse and disrespect of the feminine principles. We must stand strong now, for the earth is in great transition, and as she goes through her many changes so must we. When woman surrendered to patriarchal control, it created imbalance. Men and women together hold all the gifts to bring back harmony, peace, honor and respect. It is together we will walk again in dignity and in the beauty way.
So, yes, there are many broken women, but when things fall apart, they can be mended, and in the mending are made whole. Women are the peace keepers, and yet there is nothing more fierce than a woman protecting her young. So she need not be broken. It is not a truth that women are weak. We can choose to be whole, strong, and noble. We stand shoulder to shoulder with our men equal in every way. Indeed we must quest to heal ourselves fully from the chains of dependency, and in freeing ourselves as women, we also lift some of the burdens from the men in our lives.
When women truly know, and value themselves, and are comfortable in their femininity and their strengths, men will lose their destructive arrogance, for women will no longer give it audience. The story goes that where women blaze a trail, men will surely follow. So the day is coming when the story of broken woman will be an old legend, and in this legend she will be a heroine, and her name will be Wholesome Woman Bringer of Beauty. ~ST I KA YI
The Difference Between Sacrifice and Setttling
"Sacrificing and settling are not synonymous.When you sacrifice, you give up something in order to gain something better.When you settle, you compromise on something while sacrificing your opportunity to get something better.Make sure you settle and sacrifice for something worth it."
Yet, my friend added, "When you sacrifice you are moving in God's order...when you compromise you're just getting in God's way."
Love it!
Yet, my friend added, "When you sacrifice you are moving in God's order...when you compromise you're just getting in God's way."
Love it!
21.11.09
Obama is Exceptional
This is a great piece. I don't even need to give it much introduction. It speaks for and by itself...
It was written by a very gifted writer and speaker, whom I have known for some time. His swag I also must add is superlative. You can check him on washingtonpost.com, Arts and Living section; he's featured in "Scene In: D.C's Style Scene, Episode 2: Capitol Hill". He is currently working in D.C. Check his blog http://baldwinsaid.blogspot.com/.
Obama is Exceptional by "...Baldwin Said"
“Maybe not. Senator Barack Obama is probably one of the most talented politicians and orators of our time; arguably in history. He is the quintessential intellectual and currently holds titles as “the first” and “the only”; with one more to be added on January 20. He is an impressive individual, but his “exceptionalism” is due to exclusion.
Senator Obama IS exceptional by any standard, but he is not an exception. I don’t intend to diminish the achievements of Senator Obama; however, the lack of media coverage of successful black men leaves people in this country, and across the world, with depictions of inarticulate, criminal minded, non-parenting, money-chasing, unemployed, lazy, womanizing black men. When a black man— void of these descriptions— enters the national scene, we are amazed and awed.
At times I am shocked at the public’s reception of dynamic black men in the media. I recall when Kwame Jackson was a contestant on “The Apprentice.” To most viewers, it was almost unbelievable that Kwame was educated at Harvard’s prestigious school of business, co-founded several Internet start-ups during his time there, and held sales and marketing positions at the multi-billion dollar, Fortune 500, Procter & Gamble. Are his achievements impressive? Indeed. Should I be surprised? No.
There is an excess of positive stories of black men to be told, but the media’s failure to tell the stories of black men like Kwame, and their ardent promotion of minstrels like Flava Flav is due to pure laziness and the public’s unwillingness to accept positive images of black men.
Ill-informed images of black men in the media not only shape the public’s perception, but also influence how black men see themselves. I would argue that these depictions do not boil down to a direct cause-effect relationship— negative images seen produce negative behavior. What takes place is the creation of a subconscious framework that influences how one views and relates to black men. By perpetuating these negative images, the media reinforces pre-existing stereotypes that encourage prejudice behavior.
The most important point this raises is the esteem issues that black men face when they enter a hostile world that views them in the most negative light. A black man’s awareness of how he is perceived by society creates an additional hurdle he must overcome in order to focus and cultivate his natural talents and abilities.
Instead of striding into an interview with the self-assuredness to tout how he can uniquely contribute to an organization, he first thinks about how the interviewer will frame their interaction based on the color of his skin. Instead of being confident in his pitch to a potential client, he frets that they may be inclined to think he isn’t competent to handle their business because he is a “lazy black man.” Although one must always be aware of their environment, this neurosis impedes him from focusing on what’s important by obsessing over the racial barriers that have hindered him and generations of men like him in the past.
Senator Obama has made a positive impact on how black men are seen nationally and internationally, and has inspired many black men to continue pursuing their dreams. But to take a page from the Senator’s campaign play book— it took millions of people donating $100 and less to fortify his war chest, not just a few big spenders maxing out at $2,300— the way black men are viewed will take the stories of many to show the diversity within this community and dispel the notions of a monolithic body that history created,”
Baldwin Said.
It was written by a very gifted writer and speaker, whom I have known for some time. His swag I also must add is superlative. You can check him on washingtonpost.com, Arts and Living section; he's featured in "Scene In: D.C's Style Scene, Episode 2: Capitol Hill". He is currently working in D.C. Check his blog http://baldwinsaid.blogspot.com/.
Obama is Exceptional by "...Baldwin Said"
“Maybe not. Senator Barack Obama is probably one of the most talented politicians and orators of our time; arguably in history. He is the quintessential intellectual and currently holds titles as “the first” and “the only”; with one more to be added on January 20. He is an impressive individual, but his “exceptionalism” is due to exclusion.
Senator Obama IS exceptional by any standard, but he is not an exception. I don’t intend to diminish the achievements of Senator Obama; however, the lack of media coverage of successful black men leaves people in this country, and across the world, with depictions of inarticulate, criminal minded, non-parenting, money-chasing, unemployed, lazy, womanizing black men. When a black man— void of these descriptions— enters the national scene, we are amazed and awed.
At times I am shocked at the public’s reception of dynamic black men in the media. I recall when Kwame Jackson was a contestant on “The Apprentice.” To most viewers, it was almost unbelievable that Kwame was educated at Harvard’s prestigious school of business, co-founded several Internet start-ups during his time there, and held sales and marketing positions at the multi-billion dollar, Fortune 500, Procter & Gamble. Are his achievements impressive? Indeed. Should I be surprised? No.
There is an excess of positive stories of black men to be told, but the media’s failure to tell the stories of black men like Kwame, and their ardent promotion of minstrels like Flava Flav is due to pure laziness and the public’s unwillingness to accept positive images of black men.
Ill-informed images of black men in the media not only shape the public’s perception, but also influence how black men see themselves. I would argue that these depictions do not boil down to a direct cause-effect relationship— negative images seen produce negative behavior. What takes place is the creation of a subconscious framework that influences how one views and relates to black men. By perpetuating these negative images, the media reinforces pre-existing stereotypes that encourage prejudice behavior.
The most important point this raises is the esteem issues that black men face when they enter a hostile world that views them in the most negative light. A black man’s awareness of how he is perceived by society creates an additional hurdle he must overcome in order to focus and cultivate his natural talents and abilities.
Instead of striding into an interview with the self-assuredness to tout how he can uniquely contribute to an organization, he first thinks about how the interviewer will frame their interaction based on the color of his skin. Instead of being confident in his pitch to a potential client, he frets that they may be inclined to think he isn’t competent to handle their business because he is a “lazy black man.” Although one must always be aware of their environment, this neurosis impedes him from focusing on what’s important by obsessing over the racial barriers that have hindered him and generations of men like him in the past.
Senator Obama has made a positive impact on how black men are seen nationally and internationally, and has inspired many black men to continue pursuing their dreams. But to take a page from the Senator’s campaign play book— it took millions of people donating $100 and less to fortify his war chest, not just a few big spenders maxing out at $2,300— the way black men are viewed will take the stories of many to show the diversity within this community and dispel the notions of a monolithic body that history created,”
Baldwin Said.
17.11.09
BeYawnSay's New Vid w/GaGa
MTV doesn't seem to be too impressed by it either...
Michelle Obama on my fav network "Food Network"
Early Morning Foolishness
fB, Twitter, other random funnies
So, I'm gonna start posting random things I read that amuse me...they will all be anonymous.
The Danger of a Single Story
"This is a phenomenal discourse on the power structures of the world and the stories that shape our humanity. What she likens to power, I have always believed as privilege. Those who have power have the privilege to not only decide the stories to tell, but the privilege to dictate the narrative and narrators. There is a singleness of story, told of all disavowed, disenfranchised and oppressed ppls. That singleness, when swallowed by those without privilege, creates a vacuum in which their power goes. It is a cycle, a vicious cycle...it can be broken when the powerless and those who do not possess privilege---the power of story selection---choose and force their additional stories to be heard…" by me on fB...
Chimamanda Adichie: The danger of a single story
That original statement was before my “ah ha” moment, thank God for a good friend. I had to re-watch this. I was looking at the geopolitical and political social economy of this story…the abstract ideas and larger picture. I like big pictures, abstracts, analysis of metrics and rubrics. Power structures and displacement of liberties, morality, the shifting of mores and norms within the larger proletariat and society at large, intrigue me. I like logic and reasoning.
I was having a convo with my friend and she made a passing statement that struck me as profound. In life, we allow the single stories of and in our lives to shape who we are, what we see, what we do. I can say that I have allowed a broken family, sexual abuse, physical abuse, my own beliefs of personal failure, AND the birth of my child to hinder me. Those singular stories, I had made the only story in my life. The reality is there is more to each of those stories---overlapping stories.
Many times we allow the narrative dictated by others to change our course; but most times, we ourselves say what we can't do, rather than, empower what we can do. There is always more than one side to a story, because stories are based on nuance. When we limit ourselves to one story, we limit our existence to a one-dimensional, stagnant place that lacks relevance, variance and ultimately the power to change. It blocks our pursuit of our dreams, our visions, our purpose, our fulfillment.
Others cannot be the narrator of our story because we may have changed from whence they were involved in the plot. We cannot allow others to write our stories because language and usage is powerful and important to how a story is received and thus internalized. We cannot let others interpret our story, because only we know what the story is really about and how it really happened.
I'm not sure, if you have a story that needs retelling, rewriting, or expanding; if you do I would ask that you retell it, rewrite it, elaborate on it. It may help somebody or heal someone. Never be afraid to tell YOUR story, in YOUR voice, in YOUR way. Your story may be intrinsically different, but it is never unique. You never know who you reach, who you touch, who you heal with the simple telling of a story. The small things of others are the profound statements for another. If you don't have a story, try and remember that in others...there may be more to the story than you know.
If there is any line I would like to add to the stories of the young women like me…this would be it.
Chimamanda Adichie: The danger of a single story
That original statement was before my “ah ha” moment, thank God for a good friend. I had to re-watch this. I was looking at the geopolitical and political social economy of this story…the abstract ideas and larger picture. I like big pictures, abstracts, analysis of metrics and rubrics. Power structures and displacement of liberties, morality, the shifting of mores and norms within the larger proletariat and society at large, intrigue me. I like logic and reasoning.
I was having a convo with my friend and she made a passing statement that struck me as profound. In life, we allow the single stories of and in our lives to shape who we are, what we see, what we do. I can say that I have allowed a broken family, sexual abuse, physical abuse, my own beliefs of personal failure, AND the birth of my child to hinder me. Those singular stories, I had made the only story in my life. The reality is there is more to each of those stories---overlapping stories.
Many times we allow the narrative dictated by others to change our course; but most times, we ourselves say what we can't do, rather than, empower what we can do. There is always more than one side to a story, because stories are based on nuance. When we limit ourselves to one story, we limit our existence to a one-dimensional, stagnant place that lacks relevance, variance and ultimately the power to change. It blocks our pursuit of our dreams, our visions, our purpose, our fulfillment.
Others cannot be the narrator of our story because we may have changed from whence they were involved in the plot. We cannot allow others to write our stories because language and usage is powerful and important to how a story is received and thus internalized. We cannot let others interpret our story, because only we know what the story is really about and how it really happened.
I'm not sure, if you have a story that needs retelling, rewriting, or expanding; if you do I would ask that you retell it, rewrite it, elaborate on it. It may help somebody or heal someone. Never be afraid to tell YOUR story, in YOUR voice, in YOUR way. Your story may be intrinsically different, but it is never unique. You never know who you reach, who you touch, who you heal with the simple telling of a story. The small things of others are the profound statements for another. If you don't have a story, try and remember that in others...there may be more to the story than you know.
If there is any line I would like to add to the stories of the young women like me…this would be it.
16.11.09
My Tears Dry On Their Own...
Lyrics:
All I can ever be to you,
is the darkness that we knew
And this regret I had to get accustomed to
Once it was so right
When we were at our high,
Waiting for you in the hotel at night,
I knew I hadn't met my match,
But every moment we could snatch,
I dont know why I got so attached,
Its my responsibility,
And you dont owe nothing to me,
But to walk away I have no capacity
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but Im grown,
And in this grey, in this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own
I dont understand,
Why do I stress a man,
When theres so many better things at hand,
We could never had it all,
We had to hit a wall,
So this is inevitable withdrawlal,
Even if I stop wanting you,
And perspective pushes through
Ill be some next man's other woman soon,
I shouldn't play myself again,
I should be my own best friend,
Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but Im grown,
And it's ok,
In this blue shade
My tears dry on their own,
So we are history,
Your shadow covers me,
The sky above,
A blaze only that only lovers see
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but Im grown,
And (it's) ok,
In this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own,
I wish I could say no regrets,
And no emotional debts,
And as we kiss goodbye the sun sets,
So we are history,
The shadow covers me,
The sky above a blaze that only lovers see,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I'm grown,
And (it's) ok,
In this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I am grown,
And (it's) ok,
In this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I am grown,
And (it's) ok,
My deep shade,
My tears dry.
All I can ever be to you,
is the darkness that we knew
And this regret I had to get accustomed to
Once it was so right
When we were at our high,
Waiting for you in the hotel at night,
I knew I hadn't met my match,
But every moment we could snatch,
I dont know why I got so attached,
Its my responsibility,
And you dont owe nothing to me,
But to walk away I have no capacity
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but Im grown,
And in this grey, in this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own
I dont understand,
Why do I stress a man,
When theres so many better things at hand,
We could never had it all,
We had to hit a wall,
So this is inevitable withdrawlal,
Even if I stop wanting you,
And perspective pushes through
Ill be some next man's other woman soon,
I shouldn't play myself again,
I should be my own best friend,
Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but Im grown,
And it's ok,
In this blue shade
My tears dry on their own,
So we are history,
Your shadow covers me,
The sky above,
A blaze only that only lovers see
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but Im grown,
And (it's) ok,
In this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own,
I wish I could say no regrets,
And no emotional debts,
And as we kiss goodbye the sun sets,
So we are history,
The shadow covers me,
The sky above a blaze that only lovers see,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I'm grown,
And (it's) ok,
In this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I am grown,
And (it's) ok,
In this blue shade,
My tears dry on their own,
He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I am grown,
And (it's) ok,
My deep shade,
My tears dry.
13.11.09
YouTube - Lalah Hathaway "Let Go"
I love Lalah...and I appreciate this song. Love is possible, even when it isn't right now, ;) ha
YouTube - Lalah Hathaway "Let Go"
YouTube - Lalah Hathaway "Let Go"
10.11.09
Possible
I got to cry and I was happy for the tears. They weren’t tears of hurt, betrayal, anger, or frustration. They weren’t tears of pain, or sorrow, worry, or loneliness.
They were tears of possibility…
My cousin, Virginia, got married earlier this year. I wasn’t able to make it to her wedding for many reasons---job, money, health---life. So, I’ve watched her wedding and marriage unfold vicariously through her pictures, her posts, her words. I hear the lift in her voice, see the happiness in the words she chooses, and feel the love through the pictures I see. She is loved and loves. She feels love that is balanced and prepared; it isn’t haphazard or circumstantial. It is passionate and poised; erotic (I’m sure) but edified through timelessness…
She waited for the right time, the right man, and the right situation and it was granted to her. I have seen marriages that were less than perfect, I’m sure she has also, love that was anything but love…and those visions guided her to a place of peace, prosperity, and possibility. It allowed a man of integrity, humility and genuine love to find her. It produced a situation that was patient, respectful and blissful. Love may not have appeared in the way she envisioned or the form she had dreamed; yet, it came in just the way she needed it and thus was all that she wanted.
I cried because I was happy for her and also for myself. Seeing what she had gave me hope for what I could have. Hearing the lilt in her voice when she said his name gave me assurance that mine might lift the same way. Feeling her pride, joy and love allowed me to believe that one day I could feel the same…
I cried because love is, as it has always been, possible…
Congratulations Virginia and John. I love you and thank you for reminding me of the possibility! God bless!
They were tears of possibility…
My cousin, Virginia, got married earlier this year. I wasn’t able to make it to her wedding for many reasons---job, money, health---life. So, I’ve watched her wedding and marriage unfold vicariously through her pictures, her posts, her words. I hear the lift in her voice, see the happiness in the words she chooses, and feel the love through the pictures I see. She is loved and loves. She feels love that is balanced and prepared; it isn’t haphazard or circumstantial. It is passionate and poised; erotic (I’m sure) but edified through timelessness…
She waited for the right time, the right man, and the right situation and it was granted to her. I have seen marriages that were less than perfect, I’m sure she has also, love that was anything but love…and those visions guided her to a place of peace, prosperity, and possibility. It allowed a man of integrity, humility and genuine love to find her. It produced a situation that was patient, respectful and blissful. Love may not have appeared in the way she envisioned or the form she had dreamed; yet, it came in just the way she needed it and thus was all that she wanted.
I cried because I was happy for her and also for myself. Seeing what she had gave me hope for what I could have. Hearing the lilt in her voice when she said his name gave me assurance that mine might lift the same way. Feeling her pride, joy and love allowed me to believe that one day I could feel the same…
I cried because love is, as it has always been, possible…
Congratulations Virginia and John. I love you and thank you for reminding me of the possibility! God bless!
9.11.09
6.11.09
I AM ANGRY
"If now isn't a good time for the truth I don't see when we'll get to it." ~Nikki Giovanni
I am angry today.
I very seldom get angry. I get annoyed, agitated, frustrated and perplexed.
I get annoyed by overly emotional people who refuse to use logic; annoyed at the breakdown of the family and all the rationale used in the acceptance of such. I am agitated by my “peoples” lack of comprehension, indifference to the truth, and inability to separate themselves from a dream. I am frustrated by women’s lack of value; obsession with validation and denial of all its internal costs. I am perplexed by the willful ignorance of society and their absolute disdain for responsibility and accountability. They refuse to see the stars from the trees and therefore, are bound to have their collective history repeat itself.
I seldom get angry because I fear my own anger and am logical enough to use some consequential thinking. I’ve probably acted angry or done things that seem ridiculous when having a “temper tantrum”; but I do not get or allow myself to feel anger. I segregate it to another part of myself that handles my “emotional being”. By the time, I get back to that anger…the initial causation has probably gone away. I know myself, well. My being angry is probably not good for humanity and even worse for my enemies. I try not to have many of those either. I don’t fight, it’s foolish---again I’m logical. I understand that words have a longer lasting effect on an individual than blows. “Blows is unkind, but words is like wind.” I know I can be vindictive, the few times I have been, the results on the person were life altering---again it’s because I am logical. I can calculate how to produce the most harmful and hurtful affect on a person because I’m observant and analytical. I seldom get angry, I seldom keep enemies, I seldom allow myself to feel or wallow in anger…it’s not healthy. But today, I woke up angry.
Why am I angry?
I’m angry at parents and families. Their incessant immaturity and utter lack of self awareness has caused them to greatly malign the lives of their progeny. Their inability to get their nonsense together and come up with a workable plan of action without emotionalism and selfishness has set the stage for immeasurable damage. Granted, all children must eventually grow up and past their parents’ mistakes---choose their own actions henceforth; but the precursory cause for all children’s immediate and overarching issues stems from two people who had innumerable and still denied issues. I am angry that they’ve come from a generation of smoke and mirrors where everybody felt the need to hide their true selves for fear of what others thought. However, I have learned and seen that they were all messed up. The first generation out of the Civil Rights Movement was so intent on appearing acceptable and worthy that they felt they had to project images that were not consistent with whom they were. Am I generalizing, yes…am I overshooting the assumption, NO! Look at the state of black America…Black Americans have never been perfect, but by God, I don’t think it’s ever been this bad. The need to “arrive” on the scene of the supposed “level playing field” that they earned in mandates not mindset change, in appropriations not heartfelt change, in accommodations not spiritual change; gave them a choice. Many chose to go with the fluff rather than actualize the substance. I know too many people who are living in hiding for fear that the neighbors will know their son has a record, their daughter has been raped, their aunts are prostitutes, their uncles are on drugs, their grandparents live in the projects…their home life is falling apart. Yet, they continue going to their churches, singing their songs, praying their prayers, lying every step of the way…oh, and I am including the West Indians and Africans who conveniently try to exempt themselves. I am angry because black people just fail to want to get it and we choose those who will continue to feed our insecurities and water our inefficiencies.
I am angry at the churches…these places of professed holiness, edifices of wealth, and domiciles of deceit. I am angered by their wanton abandon for fulfillment of purpose while aggregating billions of dollars. I am angered by their intent ignorance of the manual that should guide their life in pursuit of apostles, prophets, and preachers that would cosign their lives and adulterate the original manuscript. But, what I am most mad at is in their pursuit to rule over the people through demagoguery and propaganda they have denied and declined to appear for the very work given them by Christ---feed the hungry, give water to the thirsty, visit those who are imprisoned, heal the hurting, seek justice for those unjustly maligned, stand on the side of right and make peace with those who themselves aren’t peaceful. They were TOLD to do this in spirit and in truth, through love and with faithfulness. Yet, these churches have allowed pimps into their pulpits, created schools for their sacrilege, indoctrinated idiocy into their principles, put quantity of people brought in and money raised over quality of life and service. I am appalled by the sheep that gladly go to the slaughter rather than read the requirements. I am disgusted by the “priesthood” who profess to preach God, but are more concerned with tithe raising, prop dressing, and pontification so they can be archetype celebrities and über-political power brokers. They have abandoned the true saving of souls for the acquisition of idiots. Each church has a prophet, each edifice a building fund, each congregation a mandate. Yet, for pennies they could cure diarrhea in Africa, hunger in Asia, and shelter in South America. Yet, do they do it…they do as much as any other non-profit business. If churches want to be businesses they are found wanting there, too. In order for men of little education or ability to acquire jobs they cannot anywhere else; they set up deacons boards, conferences, and organizations so they can launder people of their hard earned money and sell them one hour infomercials. Is this all churches? No. Is it most? Yes. Christianity was to be a spiritual awakening that would touch all people where they needed it most. It was to align the spirit with God, nourish the mental through learning, and take care of the physical. There is no way that God needs Baptists, Catholics, Presbyterians, Adventists, Methodists, Episcopalians, etc. If everyone is reading the same book and would read only that book there should be agreement. Each of these churches professes to read the bible, yet they each have their own spin on the truth. Newsflash…there are no spins on the truth, as soon as you spin the truth, it ceases to be true. The church globally has the ability to cure disease, feed the hungry, and clothe the naked. Nonetheless, they’d rather put on programs, pay ineffective pastors, and build centers. There will be a judgment day when all of these men and women will be found wanting for their crimes against God. For all of this, they need to stop preaching their various versions of God and just be the non-profit organizations they claim to be on their tax-exemption forms.
Finally, I am angry at society, America, in particular. I am angry because people just love not to know! People ignore the suffering of others for the supposed comfort of themselves. They deny the deprivation of others for the pretended uplift of themselves. America is being fleeced and robbed in broad daylight and no one seems to care or wants to be bothered. They allow politicians to consistently lie to them, the media to control them, Wall Street to bankrupt them, and their churches to blind them. They rather relish in the ideological emotionalism of patriotism than sober in the palpable logic that their country terrorizes others. They prefer the chest-thumping rhetoric of partisan politics over the humble truth of correct policy. They appreciate the sensationalized dishonesty of mass media over the tempered in depth reporting of true journalists. They worship the puffed up demagogues of celebrity, entertainers and sports figures over the real and tangible contributors like teachers, fire fighters and nurses. They prefer being shanghaied at noon, to thoughtful analysis and fervent rebuttal. They believe that their silence will protect them and their ignorance will secure them. Yet, silence has never protected anyone and ignorance has only blessed fools and babes. They embrace this stance in order to shirk responsibility and deny accountability. It affords them the privilege to say they didn’t know and make believe they were altruistic to other human beings. They claim to seek the best in others---they hope for change and wait for progress---yet it’s a front for not doing their homework and being sheep led to the slaughter. Every four years they create the same cesspool of inflamed arrogant rage against the so-called ruling party in an effort to assuage their own moral turpitude and guilt. Yet, every four years they repeat the same nonsense, every four years they tell the same lies, every four years they proceed in the same arrogance. I detest ignorance and abhor fools. There is a proverb, “He who knows not and knows not that he knows not is a fool, shun him. He who knows not and knows that he knows not is a child, teach him. He who knows and knows not that he knows is asleep, wake him. He who knows and knows that he knows is wise, follow him.” America is the fool and many are asleep.
"Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think." ~Martin Luther King, Jr
Today I woke up angry. By this evening, I’ll probably be back to bubbling indifference and sarcastic agitation.
"We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the vitriolic words and actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence of the good people." ~Martin Luther King, Jr., Letter From Birmingham Jail
I am angry today.
I very seldom get angry. I get annoyed, agitated, frustrated and perplexed.
I get annoyed by overly emotional people who refuse to use logic; annoyed at the breakdown of the family and all the rationale used in the acceptance of such. I am agitated by my “peoples” lack of comprehension, indifference to the truth, and inability to separate themselves from a dream. I am frustrated by women’s lack of value; obsession with validation and denial of all its internal costs. I am perplexed by the willful ignorance of society and their absolute disdain for responsibility and accountability. They refuse to see the stars from the trees and therefore, are bound to have their collective history repeat itself.
I seldom get angry because I fear my own anger and am logical enough to use some consequential thinking. I’ve probably acted angry or done things that seem ridiculous when having a “temper tantrum”; but I do not get or allow myself to feel anger. I segregate it to another part of myself that handles my “emotional being”. By the time, I get back to that anger…the initial causation has probably gone away. I know myself, well. My being angry is probably not good for humanity and even worse for my enemies. I try not to have many of those either. I don’t fight, it’s foolish---again I’m logical. I understand that words have a longer lasting effect on an individual than blows. “Blows is unkind, but words is like wind.” I know I can be vindictive, the few times I have been, the results on the person were life altering---again it’s because I am logical. I can calculate how to produce the most harmful and hurtful affect on a person because I’m observant and analytical. I seldom get angry, I seldom keep enemies, I seldom allow myself to feel or wallow in anger…it’s not healthy. But today, I woke up angry.
Why am I angry?
I’m angry at parents and families. Their incessant immaturity and utter lack of self awareness has caused them to greatly malign the lives of their progeny. Their inability to get their nonsense together and come up with a workable plan of action without emotionalism and selfishness has set the stage for immeasurable damage. Granted, all children must eventually grow up and past their parents’ mistakes---choose their own actions henceforth; but the precursory cause for all children’s immediate and overarching issues stems from two people who had innumerable and still denied issues. I am angry that they’ve come from a generation of smoke and mirrors where everybody felt the need to hide their true selves for fear of what others thought. However, I have learned and seen that they were all messed up. The first generation out of the Civil Rights Movement was so intent on appearing acceptable and worthy that they felt they had to project images that were not consistent with whom they were. Am I generalizing, yes…am I overshooting the assumption, NO! Look at the state of black America…Black Americans have never been perfect, but by God, I don’t think it’s ever been this bad. The need to “arrive” on the scene of the supposed “level playing field” that they earned in mandates not mindset change, in appropriations not heartfelt change, in accommodations not spiritual change; gave them a choice. Many chose to go with the fluff rather than actualize the substance. I know too many people who are living in hiding for fear that the neighbors will know their son has a record, their daughter has been raped, their aunts are prostitutes, their uncles are on drugs, their grandparents live in the projects…their home life is falling apart. Yet, they continue going to their churches, singing their songs, praying their prayers, lying every step of the way…oh, and I am including the West Indians and Africans who conveniently try to exempt themselves. I am angry because black people just fail to want to get it and we choose those who will continue to feed our insecurities and water our inefficiencies.
I am angry at the churches…these places of professed holiness, edifices of wealth, and domiciles of deceit. I am angered by their wanton abandon for fulfillment of purpose while aggregating billions of dollars. I am angered by their intent ignorance of the manual that should guide their life in pursuit of apostles, prophets, and preachers that would cosign their lives and adulterate the original manuscript. But, what I am most mad at is in their pursuit to rule over the people through demagoguery and propaganda they have denied and declined to appear for the very work given them by Christ---feed the hungry, give water to the thirsty, visit those who are imprisoned, heal the hurting, seek justice for those unjustly maligned, stand on the side of right and make peace with those who themselves aren’t peaceful. They were TOLD to do this in spirit and in truth, through love and with faithfulness. Yet, these churches have allowed pimps into their pulpits, created schools for their sacrilege, indoctrinated idiocy into their principles, put quantity of people brought in and money raised over quality of life and service. I am appalled by the sheep that gladly go to the slaughter rather than read the requirements. I am disgusted by the “priesthood” who profess to preach God, but are more concerned with tithe raising, prop dressing, and pontification so they can be archetype celebrities and über-political power brokers. They have abandoned the true saving of souls for the acquisition of idiots. Each church has a prophet, each edifice a building fund, each congregation a mandate. Yet, for pennies they could cure diarrhea in Africa, hunger in Asia, and shelter in South America. Yet, do they do it…they do as much as any other non-profit business. If churches want to be businesses they are found wanting there, too. In order for men of little education or ability to acquire jobs they cannot anywhere else; they set up deacons boards, conferences, and organizations so they can launder people of their hard earned money and sell them one hour infomercials. Is this all churches? No. Is it most? Yes. Christianity was to be a spiritual awakening that would touch all people where they needed it most. It was to align the spirit with God, nourish the mental through learning, and take care of the physical. There is no way that God needs Baptists, Catholics, Presbyterians, Adventists, Methodists, Episcopalians, etc. If everyone is reading the same book and would read only that book there should be agreement. Each of these churches professes to read the bible, yet they each have their own spin on the truth. Newsflash…there are no spins on the truth, as soon as you spin the truth, it ceases to be true. The church globally has the ability to cure disease, feed the hungry, and clothe the naked. Nonetheless, they’d rather put on programs, pay ineffective pastors, and build centers. There will be a judgment day when all of these men and women will be found wanting for their crimes against God. For all of this, they need to stop preaching their various versions of God and just be the non-profit organizations they claim to be on their tax-exemption forms.
Finally, I am angry at society, America, in particular. I am angry because people just love not to know! People ignore the suffering of others for the supposed comfort of themselves. They deny the deprivation of others for the pretended uplift of themselves. America is being fleeced and robbed in broad daylight and no one seems to care or wants to be bothered. They allow politicians to consistently lie to them, the media to control them, Wall Street to bankrupt them, and their churches to blind them. They rather relish in the ideological emotionalism of patriotism than sober in the palpable logic that their country terrorizes others. They prefer the chest-thumping rhetoric of partisan politics over the humble truth of correct policy. They appreciate the sensationalized dishonesty of mass media over the tempered in depth reporting of true journalists. They worship the puffed up demagogues of celebrity, entertainers and sports figures over the real and tangible contributors like teachers, fire fighters and nurses. They prefer being shanghaied at noon, to thoughtful analysis and fervent rebuttal. They believe that their silence will protect them and their ignorance will secure them. Yet, silence has never protected anyone and ignorance has only blessed fools and babes. They embrace this stance in order to shirk responsibility and deny accountability. It affords them the privilege to say they didn’t know and make believe they were altruistic to other human beings. They claim to seek the best in others---they hope for change and wait for progress---yet it’s a front for not doing their homework and being sheep led to the slaughter. Every four years they create the same cesspool of inflamed arrogant rage against the so-called ruling party in an effort to assuage their own moral turpitude and guilt. Yet, every four years they repeat the same nonsense, every four years they tell the same lies, every four years they proceed in the same arrogance. I detest ignorance and abhor fools. There is a proverb, “He who knows not and knows not that he knows not is a fool, shun him. He who knows not and knows that he knows not is a child, teach him. He who knows and knows not that he knows is asleep, wake him. He who knows and knows that he knows is wise, follow him.” America is the fool and many are asleep.
"Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think." ~Martin Luther King, Jr
Today I woke up angry. By this evening, I’ll probably be back to bubbling indifference and sarcastic agitation.
"We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the vitriolic words and actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence of the good people." ~Martin Luther King, Jr., Letter From Birmingham Jail
4.11.09
Wear Sunscreen
This piece was presented as Kurt Vonnegut's commencement address at MIT in 1997. It's great stuff, but apparently it wasn't written or delivered by Vonnegut. It's still a beautiful piece...
Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:
Wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:
Wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
I'm "Weary"
This was one of my classics...a friend reminded me of it in her post.
Lyrics to Weary :
This woman is growing weary
Of having to be so strong
Of having to pretend I’m made of stone
So I won’t end up with no broken bones
I can’t fight every battle alone
I want someone to lift me
Heal my wounds and give me kisses on my head
Say words that should be said
Fear is not the matter
I would so much rather open up my heart
And lay down my guard
Chorus:
If I could trust someone
To have my back and never do me wrong
Then I would give my love up
Just like that stop singing this soldier song
(repeat)
whomever said love was overrated
must not be getting’ none
my independent days have had their fun
but when the parties over
and the workin’ day is done
I just want to come home to someone
I want a love to take me
As I am not make me compromise myself
Or be like no one else
Fear is not the matter
I would so much rather open up my heart
And just lay down my guard
Lyrics to Weary :
This woman is growing weary
Of having to be so strong
Of having to pretend I’m made of stone
So I won’t end up with no broken bones
I can’t fight every battle alone
I want someone to lift me
Heal my wounds and give me kisses on my head
Say words that should be said
Fear is not the matter
I would so much rather open up my heart
And lay down my guard
Chorus:
If I could trust someone
To have my back and never do me wrong
Then I would give my love up
Just like that stop singing this soldier song
(repeat)
whomever said love was overrated
must not be getting’ none
my independent days have had their fun
but when the parties over
and the workin’ day is done
I just want to come home to someone
I want a love to take me
As I am not make me compromise myself
Or be like no one else
Fear is not the matter
I would so much rather open up my heart
And just lay down my guard
3.11.09
Grateful
It seems that gospel music is becoming very popular in the mainstream. Not quite sure when it happened. There's been a hit in rotation on just about every station, James Fortune's, "I Trust You". If you haven't heard it you probably live under a rock somewhere (I've posted it). Last year, Marvin Sapp busted the floodgates wide open with his song, "Never Would Have Made It". I think the popularity of gospel has to do with people's desire to believe and overcome. The intrinsic desires to succeed, prosper, and never give up. Granted, sometimes you feel like you can't take it anymore or go on any further, but in general the human spirit always tries to make it one more mile.
In light of that today's thought is very simple...just be grateful. No matter what you are faced with it could ALWAYS be worse. You could be dead. Everything in life does happen for a reason, you may not understand it, but it does. This time last year, you didn't know what was going to happen to you today. You may have had plans, but you didn't know. This exact day next year, you don't know what will happen either. So just, live in today, and have gratitude for this day. It is another day, to try something again, to get something right, to mend a broken relationship, heal a wounded soul, and repair a maligned individual. It's a new day; the slate is clean again today for you to write another story. So just be grateful, somebody didn't get this opportunity today...you did.
Make it a great day!
In light of that today's thought is very simple...just be grateful. No matter what you are faced with it could ALWAYS be worse. You could be dead. Everything in life does happen for a reason, you may not understand it, but it does. This time last year, you didn't know what was going to happen to you today. You may have had plans, but you didn't know. This exact day next year, you don't know what will happen either. So just, live in today, and have gratitude for this day. It is another day, to try something again, to get something right, to mend a broken relationship, heal a wounded soul, and repair a maligned individual. It's a new day; the slate is clean again today for you to write another story. So just be grateful, somebody didn't get this opportunity today...you did.
Make it a great day!
2.11.09
Flowing From My Heart Are the Issues of My Heart
Flowing from my heart, are the issues of my heart...it's gratefulness.
I am grateful for the things that You have done
I am grateful for the victories we've won
I could go on and on about your works
Because I'm grateful, grateful so grateful just to praise You Lord
Flowing from my heart are the issues of my heart, is gratefulness
(Repeat)
Grateful, grateful, grateful, grateful
Grateful, grateful, grateful, grateful
Grateful, grateful, grateful
Gratefulness is flowing from my heart(9x)
Flowing from my heart
Are the issues of my heart,
is gratefulness
I am grateful for the things that You have done
I am grateful for the victories we've won
I could go on and on about your works
Because I'm grateful, grateful so grateful just to praise You Lord
Flowing from my heart are the issues of my heart, is gratefulness
(Repeat)
Grateful, grateful, grateful, grateful
Grateful, grateful, grateful, grateful
Grateful, grateful, grateful
Gratefulness is flowing from my heart(9x)
Flowing from my heart
Are the issues of my heart,
is gratefulness
Be Grateful
If you're going thru and you don't know what else to do...just be still and be grateful. There is always someone else who is worse off than you, someone always glad to be where you are. If it hurts that much go help someone else...it always puts things into perspective.
Giving Up
"Letting go doesn't mean we don't care. Letting go doesn't mean we shut down. Letting go means we stop trying to force outcomes and make people behave. It means we give up resistance to the way things are, for the moment. It means we stop trying to do the impossible--controlling that which we cannot--and instead, focus on what is possible--which usually means taking care of ourselves. And we do this in gentleness, kindness, and love, as much as possible.” ~ Melody Beattie
Giving up, it’s so hard to do…but I’ve tried
Giving up on something you love or hold dear is definitely one of the hardest things in life to do. It affects your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual being. It’s why people hold on to something that’s bad or detrimental to them for so long, sometimes forever. Why we don’t let relationships expire, jobs end, items go…we form dependencies to our junk, addictions to our dependencies. We have “spiritual necrophilia” we fall in love with the dead things in our lives.
I’ve struggled with giving up; letting go of someone that I’ve loved and allowed to become a part of my being. It was hard to accept that they didn’t love me back or in a way comparable to my love for them. Sometimes, we try to manipulate what isn’t quite what we want into something that is a little more palatable. Rationalize the deficiencies into something more acceptable. Coax the situation into a favorable position for ourselves. We hold onto to the seasonal trying to make it permanent. Yet, “winter cannot go into spring”. Holding on to leaves past their season: loved ones past their exit scene, jobs past their point of fulfillment, positions past the point where we make a difference, It isn’t beneficial to anyone. We block that thing from receiving the best so that we can feel good about our choices.
In my giving up I had to accept that I wasn’t happy and therefore, I was stifling someone else’s happiness. It was quite alright to say I wasn’t getting what I needed. Yet, I had to accept that they were a child of God just like I was and had the right to choose not to make me happy. They had the right to choose to be seasonal. It was the interstitial zone where a decision needed to be made for my own fulfillment and I was vacillating hoping that my supposed partner in this boat would choose first; so I wouldn’t have to choose the inevitable---the painful. Did it make them a bad person? No. It just meant they were a bad person for me and what I needed.
Finally, something hit me! When faced with having a tumor in my breast, I didn’t question what I had to do. Did I ever cry? Of course. But, I knew that I had to choose. I could choose to hold on to my emotional and internalized views of womanhood or choose to live. The fork in the road gave me two options, and they were simply being cute and dead or not so cute and alive…I made the logical choice to live. In this situation I could to choose to be unhappy and die or find happiness and live. I had no other options, there were no other options, and I wasn’t given other options. Life had to win! It hurts, it hurt, but I can live to see another day.
What do you need to let die so that you can live?
“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.” ~Joseph Campbell
Make it a great day!
Giving Up "Live" - Donny Hathaway
It's Showtime! 10.30
"When you get through to doing all that talking..."
An older lady I knew used to say that to me all the time (I guess it's an older person saying. I believe TylerP's character, Madea, says it, too.) I can laugh at it now, but at the time it really used to piss me off. I thought ok this ole bird just doesn't understand, she sure isn't listening...doesn't she hear what I'm going through. I have now learned that she did understand and she was certainly listening; but she knew something I didn't---something more important.
What she knew was that life rarely responds to how we feel about a situation. Reality is not what you want or choose to accept; reality is what IS in spite of your desires and despite your approval. Reality remains the same whether we want to accept it or not. No amount of manipulation or denial changes it because reality is based on facts and truth. In order to change reality you must deal with the facts. Feelings can change how we perceive reality; but, in truth, rarely can alter it.
In life, things happen and you can talk about it, complain about it, and even cry about it. Yet, those things don't change the situation. They may make you feel better temporarily, but the problem will still exist. What that old lady was trying to get me to understand was that I could go all through those motions yet, I was still going to have to tackle my problem head on to overcome it. Once I got through to doing all the meaningless complaining, pointless rationalizing, aimless emoting...I would still have to act. After all that talking, I would have to choose to act or choose to be stagnant. I could choose to defeat what was in front of me or let what was in front of me defeat me. She had learned in life, that if I kept "moving forward", I would one day look back on all the things I once believed were insurmountable. I would see hurdles I had gone over miles back or the bottom of the mountain that I had scaled.
In the midst of a situation, things can seem overwhelming; but if you can hold your head and focus on the big picture---you can overcome. When you get to the other side of the problem you will look back and see it didn't kill you, it made you stronger, it prepared your for something else that was coming your way.
What are you still talking about...
"Life is not a dress rehearsal where we run our lines and practice our part. Life is the show where you only have one chance to play your role and make an impression on the audience." ~Lauren A. Carter
Make it a great day!
Its Your Time - Donald Lawrence & The Tri-City Singers
Speak Life 10.29
You speak life & death into your life. Are you speaking the things you hope to reap?
Are you allowing others to speak their diseases into your existence? Are taking your problems to problems instead of taking them to the answer?
Are you rehearsing your pain and drama? Are you replaying your trials and heartache? Are you choreographing sorrow and heartbreak?
It is important to remember that all situations are opportunities to encourage others around you. They're opportunities to focus your energy on selflessness. Sometimes, as you grow to your purpose, you must experience the "bad" so you can be a witness for someone whose going to be where you've been. Every problem is preparation for another task or trial you will encounter in life; the set-up for your next level or promotion. If you complain or allow the things of today to depress you or speak death into your existence; you will not be able to receive the blessings or accept life tomorrow. As long as you are in mourning over today, you cannot come to acceptance and peace tomorrow. Death & life cannot abide in the same place at the same time.
Never allow your current circumstance to dictate your permanent position. Circumstances change, things come and go, most things in life no matter how good or bad they seem are only temporary. Learn to see the lessons in all things. Sow the blessings that you want to harvest.
"Only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificient it is to be on the highest mountain." ~Richard M. Nixon
Make it a great day!
I Speak Life - Donald Lawrence
Nothing Lasts Forever - 10.28.09
There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness. ~ Carl Jung
Make it a great day!
Make it a great day!
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