The Beauty, Epitome and Results of Love: Barack and Michelle

“However, it’s refreshing for the future POTUS to show such ease and comfort while being the brunt of the jokes from the girls at the same time still exuding a position of authority within his family unit. Michelle's personality shows exactly what she is, educated and powerful. It’s going to be great to see her not just glowing at her husband in adoration as he speaks but have a voice and platform of her own. These are the qualities I can't wait to see in the First Family!!!”

I saw this quote while reading an article on CNN. I was supposed to be sleeping on the bus while came into work. But, I read that and all I could say was damn! This person (I shall presume is female) has summed up in a statement the dynamics of this family. This dynamic is what makes this family regal, beautiful, relevant, and important. Regal because they carry themselves with a level of poise, dignity, and dare I say class that is rarely seen. In today's reality TV driven society---which has become the mirror and true picture of our collective souls and national identity---seeing a family such as this, and a black one at that and/or no less, is refreshing for me and a blessing for many others. They are beautiful because from what we see they have found a love deep and wide enough that they can point out the flaws and shortcomings of one another without causing injury. They can laugh at the inadequacies of an individual member without being cruel. They are beautiful because they demonstrate love and a family many aspire to have but so few have attained. They are relevant; when half of the marriages in this nation are ending in divorce it is relevant to see how those that thrive work. As Americans pretend to be moral, value driven, and faith based they are relevant because this family which embodies what is best in any of us, has shown how false, salacious, prejudiced, racist, sexist, and amoral we actually are. When the other top contenders are considered, and we evaluate our support of them, we can only be judged as hypocrites. Their lives surpass the low benchmarks of our professed character checks, lifestyle lists, or religious rationales.

Yet, and most importantly, they are important. As a black woman it is a black family that is showing us what we all should, could and would be if we had the courage. Many have said it, and it bears repeating, they are this generations Huxtable family. Unless you watch re-runs you have missed not only one of the greatest American sitcoms, but one of the most triumphant American families. I won't detract from other shows, such as Good Times or House of Payne right now; however, they’re a picture that many black people were familiar with. Bill Cosby's discourse on the black family was not only new to the America that the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences lauds, the media portrays, or the average Clever, Arnold or even Bundy family knew and had seen, it was new to---many black people as well. The hundreds of thousands living in projects, low-income Section 8 housing and sprawled across ghettoes nationwide not only never saw that kind of family, but never knew that there were black people, everyday black people who were accomplished in this way. I still remember people I went to church with who thought that my friends and I were not "black enough" because we lived in the suburbs, in our own houses, spoke properly, had both of our parents in that house, and didn't have need for anything. To some of us this was a familiar picture; it was just a show that was being broadcast for the rest of the world to see. We were proud to see ourselves.

My own family was by far too dysfunctional to have met the Cosby household’s threshold rapport of love, respect, and camaraderie; yet so many of the families I grew up with did. We lived a middle class life some more upper than others. We thought it abnormal to see children in single parent homes, and many in those situations sought to hide such a fact. We were not unaware of divorce or family turbulence, the minor and sometimes major upheavals of life; however, we handled and weathered them differently. Many of our fathers were like Cliff---strong, confident, and secure, while at the same time loving, nurturing, and present. He was the king in his castle, but never had to rule with an iron fist in order to play his role. Most of our mothers were like Claire. Independent, powerful, and erudite nevertheless she was a class act, sophisticated, and caring. Like their children we made our mistakes but we were expected to do more than make just average accomplishments, do more than just make a blemish on life’s record, and pushed to understand more than meets the eye. Mediocrity wasn't only unacceptable it wasn't an option. That's not why they bought houses in suburban or less urbane urban areas, and paid high property taxes. As life would have it, we each in turn have or will expect even greater feats from our children. We were “Buppies”, not bougie, and there is a difference.

Barack Obama and his beautiful queen Michelle have embodied this spirit with their precocious, pretty, and primed princesses, Malia, 9, and Natasha “Sasha”, 6. I am excited because I had lost faith in the possibility of finding a Cliff Huxtable, but lo and behold there is hope. It is evidenced in this real life man named Barack Obama. So many men amongst my people are uneducated, unemployed and incarcerated or formerly incarcerated brood. According to statistics this lot constitutes half of my so-called brothers who most times are also the ones who disrespect me and my other sisters with their behavior, their music and their thinking. I knew once I subtracted the homosexuals and those on the down low the pool of acceptable applications would further decrease. With what was left I'd have the successful, some educated some not so much, corporate boys, musicians, and sports personalities. Since so many of them have ego and self-concept issues they tend to all of a sudden self-actualize and transcend racism and stereotypes and marry the first non-black thing that will have them. Let's be honest, I haven’t even gotten to marking off those who aren't physically appealing, emotionally stirring, mentally stimulating, or who just have bad breath and horrible clothes.

I can’t excuse women either. I'm happy and honored just to bask in the television presence of Michelle LaVaughn Obama. She has received what America considers a good education; she behaves with dignity, and sometimes often with sympathy. She is the woman I've always wanted to be. I've always liked strong woman. Lord, she has all her teeth, isn't a baby mama with 6 kids, 15 inches of weave made from someone else’s hair, she isn't died into colors she could not possibly grow, and she doesn’t have plastic, acrylic, or gel on her nails. Her clothes fit, she isn’t holding on to being thick, as a nice way of denying to herself that she is fat. She's not the type that would further degrade womanhood by being in some man's demoralizing videos or pornographic films. She is strong enough to be her own woman with her own mind and she expresses it. I have some things I know I need to work on to become like her, but I truly thank God everyday for showing me what I can be. Now that's real talk.

They are raising wonderful children, and have rightly decided that we the world do not need to know anything more about them than we already do. They will grow up to be normal functioning productive members of society, who may acquire bumps and bruises...but they aren't going to become another Lindsey Lohan, Brittany or Jamie Lynn Spears, Lil Kim or Tiffany “Miss New York” Pollard!

So I'm wondering, where are the Barack's? That's where I want to go, that's where I need to be. Someone presented the idea that you must be a Michelle. Now this is not an excuse, it’s just stating a case. I present that Claire wouldn't have been the Claire she was if she had been married to James Evans of Good Times or one of the characters in the Tyler Perry movies, plays and TV show. That's not knocking them, but even as the Bible sets forth men set the tenor of their home and their wives control the tone. Neither is greater or lesser than the other, they just play their role and know their position. As I said earlier, both Barack and Cliff definitely are the rulers of their houses, but their wives being able to run it allows/enhances their ability to rule and vice versa. Ask any single parent how hard it is to play both roles. Ask me, it's damn near impossible, that's why those who are successful at it are so applauded for the feat.

So, if someone knows Barack's, twin or younger brother, please send him this sister's way, because I'm dying to be just like Michelle! Holla!

There is such a thing
Jul 21, 2007 6:34 PM

There is such a thing

There is such a thing that is called love
That moves mountains
And creates valleys
Showers down like
Rainshowers
Brightens lives like
Sunflowers
Creates
Pleasure
And passion
And purpose

There is such a thing that is called love
That equalizes
What the rest of the world makes
Uneven
Answers questions
random equivocations formulate
Perplexes the minds of those who think only in logical reasoning’s

There is such a thing that is called love
That runs deep like rivers
ruminations
sails high in air like clouds
esoteric
Making shapes out of air
And space
And things that cannot be confined
unify
But finds ways to release those who feel
infinite
and understand this thing called
Love

There is such a thing called love
That divides
The good from the best
Can juxtapose
The dichotomy of
Our being and our feeling
It is irrational and unreal
And relevant and reality

There is such a thing called love
That transcends what we think
How we feel
What we know
Who we are
What we’ve done
And makes us into who we become
There is such a thing called love
That allows us to see the God in ourselves in others
Evolve into what God wants us to be
Our love God’s creation and commandment
Brings us closer to the divine
Destiny
We the lord of the sun and the queen of the moon

There is such a thing called love that
Gives makes creates is
Life…

Because

There is such a thing called love and it feels so damn good